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When you plant
lettuce, if it does not grow well, you don’t blame the lettuce. You look into
the reasons it is not doing well. It may need fertilizer, or more water, or
less sun. You never blame the lettuce. Yet if we have problems with our friends
or our family, we blame the other person. But if we know how to take care of
them, they will grow well, like lettuce. Blaming has no positive effect at all,
nor does trying to persuade using reason and arguments. That is my experience.
No blame, no reasoning, no argument, just understanding. If you understand, and
you show that you understand, you can love, and the situation will change. -
ThÃch Nhat Hanh
Once a group of 50
people were attending a seminar. Suddenly the speaker stopped and decided to do
a group activity. He started giving each one a balloon. Each one was asked to
write his/her name on it using a marker pen. Then all the balloons were collected
and put in another room. Now these delegates were let in that room and asked to
find the balloon which had their name written, within 5 minutes. Everyone was
frantically searching for their name, colliding with each other, pushing around
others and there was utter chaos.
At the end of 5
minutes no one could find their own balloon. Now each one was asked to randomly
collect a balloon and give it to the person whose name was written on it.
Within minutes everyone had their own balloon. The speaker began— exactly this
is happening in our lives. Everyone is frantically looking for happiness all
around, not knowing where it is. Our happiness lies in the happiness of other
people. Give them their happiness; you will get your own happiness. And this is
the purpose of human life.
Is this not what you
are looking for?
